Lady Gaga sat down for an interview recently, mostly to give commentary about her latest album, but as the interviewer paused to check over her notes, Gaga (or shall we call her Lady?) started to stare dreamily into the air above her and said, "Oooh, look, a Blibbering Humdinger!" after which she quickly looked at the floor and mumbled something about having to go get her new meat dress smoked. Before another question could be asked, Gaga's bodyguard walked over and escorted the performer out the back door.
The interviewer, while not unaccustomed to unusual antics from Lady Gaga, had this strange feeling that she had heard about Blibbering Humdingers somewhere before, and not in a Gaga song. For many days and sleepless nights her brain kept searching its deep recesses, trying to remember. Then one afternoon she hit on it—Luna Lovegood.
After this interesting revelation, the interviewer decided to do some investigating. She hired a private eye to follow Gaga around for a week. The question she hoped to answer and reveal to the world: Is Lady Gaga really Luna Lovegood?
The private eye showed up to give his report at the end of a very harried week. Following Gaga around proved to be exhausting. There were the rehearsals, the TV show performances, and the late-night outings to outrageous clubs. He did manage to sneak some views of Gaga alone, playing her piano as she had back in her Tisch School of Arts days.
And during this time, Gaga really let her hair down. No costumes, no masks, just a girl and a piano. Sitting in a tree outside Gaga's studio window, the investigator actually didn't have the best view for taking pictures. But what did it matter anyway? He still didn't have the proof of who Gaga really was, or had been.
This news discouraged the interviewer as she realized her story of the decade would not come to fruition. She put away her notes, hoping that one day the truth would yet surface. Maybe Gaga would slip again, in public, let out another dreamy exclamation at just the right moment. "Show me your cards," the interviewer said aloud, while staring at two photographs. "I think you've been bluffing."
(Thanks to my husband, Luke, for this idea and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.)